What was supposed to be a quick chat and interview turned into a three--hour coffee date filled with laughter. There is just something about Sophia that makes you instant, lifelong, best friends. Her sparkling eyes and glowing smile immediately pull you in and put you at ease.
I met Sophia moments after a nausea-inducing moment of complete panic. I had just gotten the chain on my purse stuck between the slats of a bench, and I was completely stuck. I had visions of missing the No Body Shame Boat Cruise and missing my chance to meet Whitney Way Thore. I’d just managed to free myself and I was trying to calm myself down when I heard this voice from behind me. I turned and all I saw was a giant smile. Literally in seconds I was grounded and able to breathe. I knew without knowing that I had just met someone who would be important to me going forward.
A few months ago, I asked Sophia if she would be open to sitting down and chatting for this blog, and she accepted my invitation. I’ve never interviewed someone before. How hard could it be? I came up with a few basic questions and figured I was set. Then I got to hang out with her for a few hours at an event, serendipitously, the night before our scheduled interview. I quickly realized that the questions I had prepped were garbage and I was out of my league.
Nowadays, anyone on the internet can be an “expert” on anything. There are lots of supposed “Life Coaches” out there who haven’t received any formal training, and to them Sophia says, “Fuck you, man!”
Sophia attended the Coaches Training Institute for her coach training, which included hundreds of hours of schooling six months of intensive training to become “Certified”, and also had to complete 100 client hours. She’s continued her education by completing a 10-month long leadership development course and is by delving into the world of neuroscience coaching, which is the practice of learning how our brain works and how it impacts our emotions and behaviours, because then we can shift ourselves into a better way of living.
Her coaching style is one that helps people connect back to their best self. She sees it as standing side by side with her client, joining hands and walking forward together. It ain’t going to be easy though. Beyond employing teaching components to her coaching, she also likes to “go deep”. She refers to it as opening up that scary tupperware that’s been in the back of the fridge for months. She won’t make you do it alone, but you are most definitely opening that container. There isn’t a facet of yourself that won’t go uninspected, all so that you can acknowledge and remove the layers that are hiding your best self.
Sophia speaks of neuroscience in one breath and quickly shifts to spirituality in the next. She is radiant when she recalls workshop weekends with her “Soul Sisters” and how spirituality can help heal a person and help them remain focused. The idea of energy transference or the law of attraction isn’t a new one. However, the way Sophia puts it is refreshing. Instead of giving up control to the metaphysical powers that be, Sophia’s tactic is one of intention. To give off or send out energy or emotions with the intention of a desired effect helps to keep clients grounded and focused on their journey.
I asked her how could someone test that these intended emotions/energy and their intent could be verified. She smiles and her whole demeanor changes, she becomes coy, like she’s about to share a juicy secret. I’m riveted. One of her friends lives in Norway, and they were testing this very idea. They decided that they would send each other images by visualizing an image and directing it to the other with intention. They successfully received four out of five images. It’s no surprise to me that she was successful. I don’t think that there’s anything that she can’t do.
Some of my favourite figures in history are the oracles of the Delphis of Ancient Greece. These were young women who were special, plucked from their lives and put in positions of reverence as they would tend the holiest of places, the temples of the gods. I looked at Sophia, sitting across the table from me, bathed in a soft morning light and I felt compelled to ask, “Are you a descendant of an Oracle?’ Her smile grows again. She regales me with a tale of having a spiritual reading done and how she was told that there was a time in her past that her soul was split; two bodies, one soul, an oracle and a druid acolyte. The hairs on my arms stood on end.
Sophia specializes in confidence coaching for plus-size women. Her program “Curvy & Confident: From the Boardroom to the Bedroom” teaches women how to heal their core wounds and move forward into creating their dream life. Core wounds affect how we show up in the world. Carrying the baggage and weight of shame, abandonment and betrayal keep people from reaching their highest good. She teaches her clients how to “grab life by the love handles” and to learn how to honour themselves. This includes navigating sex and relationships and learning how to make choices that honour themselves as well learning how to tap into their divine feminine energy.
As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, after spending a few hours in Sophia’s presence, I knew I needed better questions. We were at a mostly tech-centred event, in a room that was about 85% men. I wasn’t feeling great so I was more than happy to sit back and people watch, and boy did I get an eye-full! Sophia was a gentle, warm, brightly glowing flame, and the men in that room were moths. I watched them watch her like she was a new and tasty piece of candy. I watched as they circled her like shy sharks until they could work up the nerve to approach. I watched several cast longing looks and lingering gazes. I watched as a few brave men approached her to make small talk. I thought that Sophia was unaware of the effect she was having on the men in the room, but when I asked her about it, she laughed. Looking almost smug, she told me she was well aware.
As we milled about in that room, Sophia let her Divine Feminine self radiate, and she allowed herself to be visible. We’re back to intentions. While Sophia knows that her biggest challenge is dealing with her ego (she likes being awesome), she knows that it’s her projected and celebrated authentic femininity that will bring all the boys to her yard.
She said that many women struggle with letting their full selves shine becuase they worry about attracting unwanted attention, feeling safe, and have often had past experiences that prove these concerns. But she also says that we’re not living to our fullest capacity if we’re hiding parts of ourselves.
I had planned (and totally did) ask how a woman who was single could coach women on how to find a partner until I watched Sophia work that room without moving. Sophia says her relationship status is irrelevant, it’s how she shows up… and boy oh boy, she shows up! I’ve never seen anything like it.
If Sophia can help women heal and teach them what she did in that room, her career aspirations will a cinche! Sophia has a larger than life personality that was made for television and commands attention. Her dream is to operate a retreat centre for women; a place where hundreds of women will feel safe to open the tupperware dish, grow their divine feminine, experience spiritual growth, and claim their confidence.
Sophia has a free gift for you! It’s her 3-step process to stopping self-judgement and breaking-up with body shame. You can get it here: http://sophiaapostol.com/3steps/
Want to learn more about Sophia and her journey to body positivity? Check out her social media feeds: